I want to see a reality tv show where straight dudes have to read the shitty messages they send to women to their mothers.
the lesbian agenda has infiltrated smash bros
gf: hey come over ;)
me: i cant im in bonnie tyler’s music video for total eclipse of the heart
gf: my parents aren’t home
People get really irritated by mental illness. “Just fucking get it together! Suck it up, man!” I had a breakdown, and a spiritual friend came to visit me in the psych ward. And they said, “You need to get out of here. Because this is the story you’re telling yourself. You know, Patch Adams has this great work-group camp where you can learn how to really celebrate life.”
It’s something people are so powerless over, and so often they want to make it your fault. It’s nobody’s fault. I started thinking of suicide when I was 10 years old—I can’t believe that that’s somebody’s fault. Like, “Oh, you’re just an attention getter.” Mental illness isn’t seen as an illness, it’s seen as a choice.
Yeah. I have a joke about how people don’t talk about mental illness the way they do other regular illnesses. “Well, apparently Jeff has cancer. Uh, I have cancer. We all have cancer. You go to chemotherapy you get it taken care of, am I right? You get back to work.” Or: “I was dating this chick, and three months in, she tells me that she wears glasses, and she’s been wearing contact lenses all this time. She needs help seeing. I was like, listen, I’m not into all that Western medicine shit. If you want to see, then work at it. Figure out how not to be so myopic. You know?”
basic bitches, as opposed to acidic bitches or neutral bitches
I can’t believe it took me two hours to get this joke.
i don’t want to be a part of a college system where plagiarism is a worse crime than rape
pros of turning 18: can legally do the stuff i already do
cons of turning 18: no longer the dancing queen
I FUCKING HATE BAZINGA TWINK AND THAT THE BIG BANG SUCK MY ASS SHOW FUCKING SEXIST ASS SHOW ABOUT WHITE NERDS THAT MAKE SCIENCE JOKES FROM LIKE THE FIFTH GRADE HOW THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT STILL WINNING FUCKING AWARDS LITERALLY BAZINGA MY FUCKING ASSHOLE